In The Darkness of The Night

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Assalamualaikum WBT, hello and hi to dear readers. Tonight (by the time I'm writing this) I want to talk about something that I face since I don't know when.


Have you ever staying up late at night, doing something maybe like your work, assignments, games, tv shows, or just lying in bed blinking, staring on the ceiling, waiting to fall asleep? Then suddenly you feel your heart beating faster, unexplained emotions, runs through your vessels, your heart suddenly feel extremely heavy, your head hurts, and on the verge of tears, even though you're may or may not having any problems at the time.. ? 


Because I do. All the time.



I'm just thinking, maybe that's why Allah SWT,; The Creator, create night for us to rest? I've seen this one video about Surah Ad-Dhuha (I really recommend this video, you can search on youtube ' Makna surah Ad-Dhuha') , and on verse 2 ; translates to: "And [by] the night when it covers with darkness," 



The speaker said a weak soul usually don't sleep and night, which means their life always filled with darkness; as they always meet the night and sleep on the daylight, hence the depression. This video really opens my eyes towards my situation and helped me in the past, two years ago when I'm having a rough time.  



Most people (including me) know having enough sleep is essential, but how do they sleep when inspiration always comes during that time? While they recap all things that happened in their life, whether it's a good moment, a bad one, or anything that boils the blood. Maybe that's why they say an artist always have something going on in their head, because sometimes we get inspiration in a hard way.

 Overthinking? Hallucination? Bad dreams? A brutal reality? "Yes, that may be a good subject for the artwork". Like Surrealism, it takes an artist to do drugs; hallucination and dreams. A weird perception that is portrayed through their art. Sometimes I'm getting chills thinking about that.


Sorry, kinda out of the track there.



But really, I hope I can really manage my time decently and use the resting time that He creates for us. It's kinda sucks too for always getting sleepy in the day while I have so many chores to do. Hahaha it's kinda ironic since I'm writing this at 4 am. "Imagine having a good sleep, feel refreshed every morning, ready to tackle down any problems, being productive and free of unnecessary thinking. Oh, how lovely that would be!" - every student ever. Just kidding.



When I'm having those times where I think too much, whether in tears or not, I'm still grateful for still having the bittersweet of this thing called 'Life'. Like, we actually could do many great things in life and why are we still gonna make the past, or present, our situation a hindrance for us to go further? Man, human minds really weird huh.... -oops I nearly forgot we have this one thing, emotions. Well, guess I'm not questioning anymore, because I can lost to them too.



And here I just wanna say, Your tears make you stronger, your hardship makes you wiser, mistake makes you learn, if you didn't realise yet, every bad thing have a good twist to it. 



May Allah SWT eventually give you something worth the sleepless nights.



Last word for this entry: 



Unveils thought through the night,

The longer it becomes a burden,
Keep trying using all might,
To stop the soul from swollen.


Assalamualaikum.











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